February 16 Pay the Bills

The gray Toyota pulled up right on schedule and the license plate matched. He was cheerful and polite, introducing himself and asking for music preferences even though the ride was a short one. Yet, this trip was different.

I know this sounds ageist, but he really was older than most divers, a lot. He also was more vested in small talk than most, at least from my experience. I listened for the most part, and added to his comment about the challenging economy.

"That's what my wife used to say," he noted with a sigh as we arrived. "She passed last summer leaving me a heap of medical bills I'm trying to pay down. That's why I'm driving! The great thing is I get to meet people like you." 

it is possible this was a ploy to get a bigger tip; however, I don't think so. 

February 15 Galentines

"Growing up" and "growing older" both have their own unique challenges that require us to assess the situation and make the best choices for ourselves.  Holidays pose lots of pressure and angst as expectations and reality intersect in the real world. I am not sure who marketed the idea of Galentines Day, but I am sure glad they did!

We all needed to connect with others

After the bitter cold, lasting snow,

Personal, national world-wide

Relentless scary news, fears

Losses, worries, changes

Lunch specials, hummus,

Shared stories, hope

Galentines

Gather

Glad

You are

In my world,

Chapter, gym, life

Cards, gifts, not needed

Just listening, caring

Respecting, valuing, all

In this unfamiliar chapter 

Where appreciation, respecting 

Are the very best gifts you can offer

February 14: Valentines

There is a "witty" article about Valentine's Day cards in the times today that is worth your 5 minute read even if you are not giving or receiving a card that talks about the history of this holiday that until today had eluded at least me!

In brief, it was, perhaps, originally a Pagan festival that involved goat slaughter and nudity! Later on, it involved the luck of the draw and your valentine could be your brother! A generation ago, no one could have imagined the squishy filled kid parties, grand Galentines gatherings, and packed restaurants of today.  

I did not buy any cards again this year; however, for those ten of you who read this babble, I am taking this moment to say I appreciate you and however we are connected:

I appreciate you more than warm
Chicken soup on a cold night,

More than lobster, crab, and 

Grilled tuna perfectly cooked.

More than a great book, a powerful

Movie and a cup of Harney's tea

I appreciate you however we are 

Connected.

February 13:They Loved Me

During some low times,

When others ran away,

They sustained me, 

Without me asking.

Begged for long walks, 

Early, late, they 

Slept next to me, reminding

Me to breathe, to wake, to smile.

Somehow they knew my needs, 

Before I did. 

One was already older, 

With a panic attacks,

Blending into the night sky.

The other was younger, 

With a penchant for bolting

Barking for no reason,

With hair that never stopped.

Yet, they knew I needed them

So they stayed close.

February 12: Loves, I Have A Few

 

I have never been a big fan of the holiday on the 14th of February. If you don't have a significant other, it's lonely.  If you have a significant other, you might not have time to celebrate. If you are in a long term relationship, a cleaned bathroom might be the best gift of all. 

But, in the spirit of the great month celebrating love, I have a list of some things I love:

To be nestled on a stack of soft pillows
Under neatly layered blankets

Between freshly laundered sheets

With my Kindle,

Lost in a story.

Walking through the leaves,

Among the buds, beneath the leaves

Beside the creek, along the path

Listening, appreciating

Embracing the day.

Moments when family gathers

Those I love are celebrating, 

Talking, sharing, building

Memories to sustain them

Absorbing the moments.

February 11: Mixed Emotions

There has been a firestorm about a comment made by Olympic skier, Hunter Hess, and others what have said things like:

"It brings up mixed emotions to represent the U.S. right now I think. It's a little hard. There's obviously a lot going on that I'm not the biggest fan of and I think a lot of people aren't. I think for me, it's more I'm representing my friends and family back home, the people that represented before me, all the things that I believe are good about the U.S."

Here I am,

Significantly older,

Supposedly wiser,

Yet, I could not

Say it any better.

No race of my life this week

Yet, I too have 

Mixed emotions, these days

It's a little hard,

I'm not the biggest far

Of lots going on.

Yet, I tune in to watch

Proudly those who 

Represent all that is good 

About my country.

February10: Slice of Life: One of Those Books

Thanks to Two Writing Teachers for a platform where we share slices of our life every Tuesday and every day in March.

It was near zero, the wind was howling, 

Hair damp from the pool no one was 

Rushing to go out in the cold,

We lingered discussing those books that 

You long remember, that keep

You from falling asleep, doing the dishes.

That's where I heard about 

Shelly Noble's The Colony Club,

Where in 1906, real and fictional characters 

Mingle as they create a first club for women in NYC.

I fell in love with the movers and shakers, an aspiring 

Architect who stretched, challenged norms and status.

The wind was still howling,

When I reached the last page

Exhausted from swiping pages,

I looked up to find dirty dishes, 

Waiting laundry, unopened mail,

Grateful to find one of those books.

February 9: Half Time

II usually watch the Super Bowl, if I even watch it, for the commercials, but yesterday the NYT imes published them in their online edition, so I did not need to watch at all.  Yet, I watched in order to see the half-time show!  I had missed the wardrobe fail a few years ago and so I wanted to be on top of the news this time.  I am very glad I watched! While there was a bit that pushed my own comfort level (I also find bits of MOST music videos outside my own comfort zone)  you do not need to be fluent in Spanish to appreciate the music. The performance really did pay homage to the melting pot we are all lucky enough to call America.

He stood atop

La Casita, between

Sugar canes, beside

Lady Gaga and Ricky Martin.

He shared a bit of himself

His family and culture.

At the pinnacle of American 

Culture he celebrated

Believing in yourself,

Hard work, 

The ol' American Dream.

February 8: I/We/You Should Know That

This weekend is packed full of events that fill airway There are a million news stories of victories and losses that commingle with news of outrageous insults. I/we are/you should be reminded that our words are powerful and can change the direction of our/other's lives/your life I am confident I am not alone in my outrage of racist, sexist, and human degrading remarks. We all matter.

Our words matter

When we erase, deny

They linger, fester

Growing anyway

We cannot take them back.

Our tone matters

When we threaten with words

They hurt, causing wounds

Festering forever

We cannot take them back.

We all matter

You should know that

Our gender, skin, family origins

Strengths, limitations, wealth

We all feel, agonize, anger

Hurt when attacked

You should know that.

February 6: It Is Scary

During long hospital stays, my dad coped by reading the NYTimes and watching Jeopardy. We laughed that while his body was failing, his mind was intact. As I learn of dementia diagnoses of people I know, I realize why my dad said he was one of the lucky ones.

"I just don't remember this road," she said as we drove a familiar road. 

"It will be our last," he noted without elaboration.

"He does not know me," she sighed.

Neurons are damaged or destroyed

Alzheimer's is the most common (60-80%)

Vascular, frontotemporal, 

Hippocamp sclerosis, Lewy body, and more.

More than 7 million Americans have it.

Risk for women, 1 in 5

Risk for men, 1 in 10

42% may develop it in their lifetime!

More than 12 million family members are caregivers

Between 2020 and 2022 deaths increased by 142%

Why aren't we talking about it?

Are we afraid talking about it will be scary?

February 5: Every One Matters

Today, I am sharing with Spiritual Journey, a new-for-me-to-share group; however, I have long been on a spiritual journey, Today's prompt asks us to think about our attitude and consider this quote by Dalai Lama, “Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.” 

It was cold, again, this morning and I really was thinking of skipping aquacise in favor of a second cup of coffee and another chapter or two; however, I had offered to to drive a friend and didn't want to leave her hanging.  It was still single digits when she got into the car and sighed, "I would not have come if I had not agreed to go with you."  

Now, we could have just bagged the pool plan and headed to the local coffee house; however, we headed to our destination where the real fun began. We played with pool noodles rather than belts and kick boards rather than weights. Time flew by as we laughed, sighed and sang happy birthday to a friend, because every one matters. Somehow, the sun was shining as we looked forward to the rest of the day and the days ahead.

We almost missed it!

A memorable gathering

On a frigid morning.

We almost missed the reminder! 

Every one matters.

Everyone matters.

T

February 3 Slice of Life: Not Goldfish

 It's February and like the herds of other pathetic grandmothers who never ever got their own children gifts for Valentine's Day, I was thinking of a gift basket for my grands as I grabbed a few things at Shop Rite. I was planning on fruit, nuts, and some treats when the 23ounce box of Goldfish, on the endcap with the sale sticker, caught my eye. 

Thinking, "What a cool idea,"

Tossing the box in the cart before

Stopping in my tracks while

Reading the sign closely

Pondering what the sign meant

Questioning if the sign matched

Rethinking that snack food 

Reconsidering its artificial ingredients

Guessing the impact of high prices

Supposing many will not be

Buying that age-old junk food 

Selling for just $9.99 rather than $11.39

Conjecturing that they/we all will be 

Eating healthier treats, perhaps?

Speculating about Pepperidge Farm's future?

Thinking perhaps a bin of ants on logs*?

*Ants on logs is peanut butter filled celery with raisinsToday's Slice is not sponsored by Shop Rite

February 2: Growing Up Is Hard to Do

I watched Joni Mitchell during her Grammy speech accepting the award for best historical album and clearly I joined most who were watching as thoughts about aging swirled in my head. Joni has struggled back from a stroke a decade ago. Thus, it was amazing that she was able to be on stage. I smiled as she joked about the glitter; I shuddered as she stood silently, appearing to forget what she was doing on that stage as lines from Teddy Swims (which I am highlighting) swirled in my head.

Growing up is getting old,

I'm now less bold and always cold!

It hits me when the wrinkles show,

Bothers my back when I reach down low,

I still make the same mistakes,

But now only dream of eating steaks,

At times, life starts to lose its magic,

I have learned, though, not to panic

Growing up is hard to do,

At times, it really makes me blue.

February 1 I Lost January

I spent many evenings sure that I must have dropped one of the 1000 little pieces causing me turmoil. I was sure there was some logical reason that I could not find the needed little piece of yellow with three ins and one out. I even searched the vacuum once!  When my back ached from leaning over the counter and my eyelids struggled to stay open, I was critical of both Van Gogh's iconic painting and the giver of this gift that gnawed at my soul. I lost January to a puzzle!

As February begins, the stars are a lot clearer and those endless swirls now resemble happy doodles. The wide expanse of this starry night sky rests perfectly on top of the sleeping village, rolling ills, and babbling brooks. In fact, the whole thing came together because every day I decided to stay with it even when I was frustrated. Perhaps, this Starry Night is a metaphor for fighting through the tough times. 

January 31: Favorites

 It was 2 degrees early in the morning when we headed to the pool, dressed warmly and wondering if we would be alone.  We were met with good music and equally-crazy friends who filled the locker room with shared wisdom before heading back outside. This conversation ensued as I put on my socks!

"Let me see those," she said,
Pointing to socks bearing my name

Honoring my love of books.

"They're warm and my favorite," I began

Interrupted by 

"Have you seen my favorites with the image of my dog?

"My favorite socks have kittens!"

"My favorite cousin sent me these," I finished.

"My favorite cousin lives far away. I miss her."

"My favorite cousin sent me soup when I was sick."

"I made my favorite lentil soup last night."

"I had my favorite salmon at the Inn."

"I snuggled into my favorite pajamas early,"

"This cold is not my favorite."

I think the message is this: If you show a group of women in a locker room a pair of socks, they will talk about everything and anything!

January 29 Weigh, Weight, Weights

One thing I have noticed again and again about writing is that the more I write, the easier the topics seem to flow from my cursor! A trip to the Dr spurred this one.

• 
  

"Hop on and we'll see

What you weigh," she

Said with a cadence suggesting

It has been said before and

Will be said again.

"Your weight is borderline," she

Said with a cadence suggesting 

It has been said before and 

Will be said again.

"I'm exercising and lifting weights," I 

Said with a cadence suggesting 

It has been said before and 

Will be said again.

These days, I do the weights

Even if it does not help my weight.

Bones, muscles, strength, stairs,

My goals not theirs, but clearly

Weights seem to offset the scorn

When what I weigh is not the 

Optimal weight.

January 28 Something Valuable Has Been Stolen

Yesterday, Glenda Funk wrote about a prompt triggered by another blogger, Kim Johnson, based on a book found in a thrift store.  One of the prompts, Something Valuable Has Been Stolen, spoke to me. This Post makes me very sad.

I wish you had been here

When

They were tiny miracles, dependent,

Squishy bundles, reflecting the future.

They took those first  bites, steps, rides

Reaching for support, reassurance, 

They drew you a rainbow, 

Filled with hope, love, 

They ran, biked, slid, scooted, swam,

Faster and faster and faster time has gone

They needed those lessons, snuggles, ideas

Linking their history with their future.

They have a void they cannot fill because

Something valuable has been stolen

January 27 I Hope

I am sharing as part of the Two Writing Teachers Slice of Life group today.  I am devastated by the recent ICE events that killed two people. This has weighed heavily on my heart making it hard to focus.  I know I am not alone.

Frigid temps, 

Huge storm looming,

Emily in Paris, total distraction until

Fitful sleep, waiting the beginning,

Waking to steady snow, devasting news,

Watching, processing the events, 

Shoveling, listening to reactions,

Watching, in disbelief,

Shoveling, praying for change,

The Housemaid for distraction while

Frigid temps, 

I hope this ICE storm ends, soon.

January 26 A Charged Rhetorical Moment

At Ethical ELA, Sarah Donovan shared "Teaching a Charged Rhetorical Moment with Care: Reading images Before They Become Arguments" on January 26.  It is worth a read even if you are not faced with the Herculean task of working with our youth during these very challenging times. We are all trying to process the words and pictures that evoke strong emotional responses. 

Dr. Donovan suggests, "To keep this work from becoming positional or combative, writing should function first as sense-making rather than argument." She goes on to say, "literacy is not only about persuasion. It is also about attention, restraint, and care."

January 25 Out of Touch

There is a mega winter storm brewing amidst a nation in crisis; yet, as Robert Frost said, "Life goes on," and this is how I am spending this day or two.

It had been wonky

Freezing up randomly

Yet working fine other times.

Until late last night when I 

Tried to do a restart.

It did not, so I am 

Out of touch.

Yes, there is still

Email. Facebook, Instagram

Google Chat, Neighbors,

News, Netflix, 

But, I am still

Out of touch.

I am thinking about

People who might try to 

Text, call check in

While we are all 

Grounded from this winter

Storm amidst bigger

Life changing storms 

In this life

But, I am

Out of touch.

For the next few days

I have a very first world

Very minor issue

During this very sad,

Scary season of life

In this country

Out of touch. 

January 24 Ready for the Storm

It would appear that nerves are frayed on many levels today and the forecast of 2-24 inches of snow and ice has put locals on edge.  

If they forecast storms

With epic potential 

To upend life, people will run

To stores in panic

To clear out milk, bread, eggs,

As if their lives depend on it.

Inside my home, I have books ready

Along with flashlights, tea and dark chocolate.

January 23 Storm's Coming; So is Spring

There is a storm heading our way and the mixed emotions, valid concerns, and pure excitement seem to be bubbling over.  As for me, I am going to park my car at the end of my driveway and wait for spring in 56 days.

Doom,

Prepare,

For the worst,

Ice, snow coming.

Shovels and blowers

Flying out of the shop

Milk, bread, soda, chips, flour,

Binge watching til power goes out

Snow plowers, shovelers preparing

For the brightest of days ahead for them.

While at Shop Rite the crowd is wild with

Panic, excitement, mixed with fear

While hope for a snow day loom

Brightly amidst the fear

Of a zoom day or

A clean your room

Or a change

In the

Storm

• 

January 23 Celebration of Life

I am pretty sure none of us really want to go to events that focusing on loss; yet, I found myself deeply reflective and divinely inspired as I listened to his children, grandchildren, and friends talk about a gentleman who celebrated learning, loving and life.

We only get one opportunity

To fill up the "dash" between

Our birth and our goodbye.

Embrace your family,

Learn a sport (or two),

Master an instrument,

Start a business,

Pick up a lifelong hobby, 

Like chess, puzzles,

Give generously,

Uplift others,

Solve problems,

Advocate for those

Less fortunate, in need.

Adopt causes,

Welcome challenges,

Enjoy a good mean

Celebrate with friends,

Eat dessert.