Tried to connect, secure, clarify plans,
That were about to change.
Heard about aches, pains, heartaches.
Shared thoughts, ideas, perspectives.
Real issues, real concerns.
Heard about problems, worries, procrastination.
Offered hopes, dreams, perspectives.
Problem solving, plans,
Felt empathy, caring, understanding.
Watched the tide of real-life-problems
Slowing, without heading to sea.
Remembered, we are not alone,
On this often challenging journey.
3 comments:
It's easy to discuss the merits of craft with your poem...in addition to its powerful beating heart. The structure makes everything cohere: Verbs lead the way:—"Tried...Shared...Offered...Watched." Then the second line in each tercet where you present the "what," and before the poem returns to the verbs after your consideration (what you are actually experiencing as the theme of the poem):"Heard...Heard...Felt...Remembered." The fourth line in the final stanza says it all: "On this challenging journey." And I love the line, "Slowing without heading out to sea," the comfort of calm without being swamped. Thanks for this!
I feel all of your emotions in this poem. The final stanza worked well to connect everyone to the fact that we all have difficult journeys in life. Kudos!
It sounds like a busy week full of important work. I like the "the tide of real-life-problems" metaphor, and "we are not alone" on the journey is helpful to all who read and all who you are trying, sharing, offering, hearing, remembering with.
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